Category Archives: A Walk To Remember
Life is a journey that never ends; let’s take a trip into my history to reminisce the (good) ol’ days.
happy mother’s day – I’ll tell you why my mother is a remarkable woman by any measure.
It’s Mother’s Day! I’m single-dating her tonight and I hope that she would have enjoyed the food and the company of her favourite son (Ha!). And since I (think I) am a writer, I will of course blog about my mother on this day that rightly belongs to her.
Mummy, I know you’re reading this – I love you and I want you to know that I am immensely proud of you for raising Maisie and me. You have done a remarkable job with your limited resources and no amount of words will do justice to the sacrifice that you have put in. But I do hope that you will be honoured this way – because I respect and love you very much. 放心，我和妹妹会照顾你的！
***
I found the transcript of an email interview my mentor Peter Lim conducted with me. It was part of his article for Motherhood magazine. And I was hoping that this may turn out to be a good read. This document dates back to June 2006 – so what you are about to read is my perspective half a decade ago, when I was still in the Army. And I’d like to think I’ll probably answer these questions in the same way if I am asked again today.
Anyhow, I’m publishing the document as it is. Enjoy the read. (:
1. Do you mind if I title it (the article): “Our mum is a divorcee”? And you can send me a happy smiling picture of yourself and your sister?
>>> Ya, actually I do mind. Because I never saw her as a divorcee. So I don’t want others to think that we think of her that way. In my head and heart she’s one amazing super mother. She’s living proof that you can raise two kids properly without a husband and with income that could only make ends meet. Her sacrifice is second to none. Perhaps you could skew your title to something with sacrifice? I’ll leave the coining of the title to you then.
2. How old were both of you when your parents divorced?
>>> Maisie and I were 5 and 8 years old respectively when our parents officially divorced.
3. Did you know why they divorced?
>>> Over the years, many different reasons have surfaced; some were conventional ones like financial disputes and failure to meet expectations, but there are also a couple of reasons that I cannot share because it’s just too personal. Both our father and mother gave us different perspectives on why the marriage failed; and of course they absolved themselves of any traces of blame. When we were younger we couldn’t understand why, but now that we are older, we see a much clearer picture by piecing all these information together. We’d blame neither of them for what has happened – or we’d blame the both of them.
4. What were your reactions then? (Or were you too young to understand?)
>>> At 5 and 8 years old, I honestly think we were too young to understand. The fact that I existed in a single-parent family only hit me when I was 15 years old. It hit my sister too, but differently. I hated my father for not being around, for not lighting my path to manhood, for not disciplining me etc., etc. Kids who have their fathers by their side through their growing up years will never understand what I went through so I’d say to treasure your father – they are a gift from God to their children. My sister struggled with another set of hurts; once the apple of her father’s eye, she found herself “demoted” to second-best when my father remarried and his wife bore him a son. She was no longer daddy’s girl and not being able to approach our Papa like the loving father that he used to be that hurt her the most.
5. What do you feel is missing (if anything at all) from a single-parent family?
>>> Nothing is missing from a single-parent family. 3 is a whole number and not an odd number. Our mother has done such a remarkable job at playing different roles you couldn’t tell that we were from a single-parent home. It did help that we became Christians; in church, we’ve been blessed to have a lot of brothers and sisters, both young and old, to love and protect us. Our maternal and paternal relatives are also a closely knit group. Maisie and I were never lacking in any area.
6. Do you compare yourselves to friends who have both parents in their growing up years?
>>> Comparisons are inevitable. We look at “complete” families and although we are delighted for them, we also feel a tinge of envy. But we wouldn’t have traded our single-parent upbringing for an “ideal” family (by the world’s standard). Our family background has allowed us to experience things that some kids would never even imagine. It has made us stronger, wiser and certainly more independent than most kids. We are more aware of what’s going on around us and there’s this unmistakable drive that Maisie and I both have; I firmly believe this was birthed out of a unique upbringing.
7. In your parents’ case, was there anything positive in being divorced (from your perspectives, not theirs)?
>>> Our mother married our father when she was 20 years old. She had her firstborn at 22 years old. While it was common for women in the past to marry early, it also meant that she never had the chance to “see the world”, and had to care and provide for her own family at a premature age. The divorce allowed her to expand her horizons, social circle and of course the way she perceives things.
>>> For our father, as he was the initial custodian to us both, his life revolved around us. His first and last thoughts of the day were of and for us. He was quite an extraordinary father. However, due to circumstances, my sister moved in with my mother after a couple of years, and I followed suit after another couple of years. I believe my dad’s life picked up from there. To date, I’m not sure if the path he chose (to start another family) was what he desired, or what he needed to do to feel normal again.
>>> Both of them have become a very different person from who they knew each other to be.
8. What’s your advice to parents who are divorcing/divorced, in relation to consideration for their kids?
>>> Regardless of marital status, always be there for your children whenever they need you. Your children belong to both of you, not one of you. It is possible to raise good and sensible kids even if you are divorced, but it requires an intentional and active sacrifice. Time is the greatest gift you can give to your children. Your presence makes a difference in their lives so don’t let your absence become the difference in their lives.
- Three is a whole number – still happy and smiling today.
I love my church… part 1.
Probably our favourite photograph together, taken at the inaugural Rhema in 2006.
I have arrived at the 18th month of my journey with Grace AG and it has been an eye-opening experience. A perfect church doesn’t exist and Grace AG is no different; there are cracks and weaknesses in my church, just like there are in yours. (I’m throwing the “This-is-not-your-church-this-is-His-church” cliche out of the window – I’m not here to quibble over semantics.) But not everyone, be it a salaried minister or a serving member, will dare to make this statement:
“I love my church.”
And I’ve been privileged enough to meet men and women whom I’m confident will dare to make that statement – Lionel, Joel and Suhui, just to name a few. As for my colleagues, I only have superficial knowledge of the majority of them but I do have intimate knowledge of one man – Ps Ronald. And I know he loves his church. His passion for Grace AG has rubbed off not just on me, but on many others who have crossed his path.
One reason why I look toward Ps Ronald as a role model is that he is a home-grown pastor. (Sidetrack, but I humbly think that we need more home-grown ministers!) This man was once a rebellious teenager; he once served as a Sunday School superintendent; and I believe that in his 12 years serving full-time in Grace AG as a youth pastor, he has stepped on many toes in the name of advancing the church. I believe that all good leaders have an insatiable appetite to improve their organisation with whatever influence they have. Their attitude is always exemplary and inspirational. After all, attitude reflect leadership (Julius Campbell).
I am a passionate person and I am not ashamed of the way I communicate. A couple of days ago, I enjoyed a heated phone conversation with Ps Ronald; it was almost cathartic to have these occasional dialogues. No, we didn’t quarrel. I doubt we’ve ever quarreled outrightly. I love and respect him too much to fight against him. He has over the years led me by example and proven that he is fighting alongside me. You must have heard me say this time and again – everyone has a hero of faith and Ps Ronald is in my hall of fame.
I brought to him a couple of issues that were tussling in my head in an open and honest manner. And I didn’t mince my words. There aren’t many people who can convincingly tell me, “I know where you are coming from”, and have me believe them. And there aren’t many people who can make me feel like they’ve really heard what I had to say and understood every word of it. Ps Ronald is one of the few who can cut it with me.
I put down the phone and sent him a follow-up text:
Bro, sorry if I sounded rude or disrespectful. I do get carried away and am passionate in my arguments. Trust you know it’s nothing personal. I’m challenging the policy, not the person.
His candid response made me beam with pride – for who doesn’t want to be a reflection of their role model? This was what he replied verbatim:
Yes, miniature Ronald. Hahahaha. You brought up a good point…
And the rest I shall omit… Well, you may not make heads or tails of what Ps Ronald and I exchanged but that was a significant moment for me, even though he has affirmed me time and again that I remind him of himself when he first started out in ministry. I believe that there are many others on the staff team who are like Ps Ronald and I – people who love the church and want to see it grow and change for the better.
Are you an old-timer harping on the church’s distinguished history?
Let the young ones show you how much they will love the church!
Are you a young person discouraged by the church’s dismal destiny?
Let the older folks show you how much they still love the church!
My rhetoric to you tonight is – “Do you love your church?”
God knows the answer in your heart and Man will know the answer by your fruit.
No, Grace AG isn’t just my place of employment.
It is home – my home – and I will fiercely protect it.
perth day 9: I carry you with me.
Four final shots at our unofficial Perth Retreat Centre. Haha! :P
I’m glad I took the time and effort to write daily in the past nine days; now these wonderful memories are forever locked away and never forgotten (especially since I am so absent-minded). It has been a memorable holiday and certainly served its purpose of providing rejuvenation and revelation. With bated breath, I look forward to leading R-AGE, marriage preparations, restarting a new school semester next week and… My next holiday. (: For now, I believe I will enjoy re-reading these entries and re-living those memories:
- Day 1: high time to unwind. | Huiyi and I set foot in Down Under determined to unwind.
- Day 2: uptown girl and downtown boy. | One day was all we needed to see the city centre.
- Day 3: a tiny glimpse of the great outback. | We felt awed and dwarfed by God’s majesty.
- Day 4: mentoring on the road. | All roads lead to deep and meaningful conversations.
- Day 5: in wide open wonder. | Man could only complement what God delivers everyday.
- Day 6: the jewel in any family. | Prayerfully, may it be a foreshadow of Mummy and I.
- Day 7: it doesn’t matter where we go or what we do. | Love should be experienced together.
- Day 8: top eight regrets of this holiday. | I’ll add one more – wished this break was longer!
Day 9 passed the fastest. Before we knew it, we already had lunch and completed last-minute purchases at Cockburn (pronounced “Koh-burn”, not “Kok-burn”) Gateway Shopping City. We returned home after that and Huiyi and I attempted to seal our luggages while Ervina and Chin Seng prepared for our last supper at the patio. No one could actually tell that I was feeling quite sad that I would soon be saying goodbye to the lovely people here; I honestly thought it was too melodramatic to display my emotions so I held myself back.
Chin Seng powered up the outdoor gas-powered barbecue pit and brought out gigantic tiger prawns and huge chicken wings while Ervina prepared a refreshing spinach garden salad with red wine vinegar and a lovely concoction of mint honey iced tea. Even Granny Aw joined in the action and contributed an avant-garde spicy cucumber and parsley salad of her own. (I’m pretty sure Huiyi and) I felt the love that has been so generously lavished upon us as we waited for dinner to be ready. Ervina gave thanks for the final time as we tucked in to a sumptuous spread. I shamelessly asked Granny Aw if she would miss me… And she said, “当然会，你们走了这个屋子没有那么热闹”. My heart practically melted.
We snapped our final photos before we gathered in a circle in the living room and held hands to pray for one another. I was so inspired by the way Granny Aw prayed – fervent and full of faith! With one final sweep of the house, we ensured that we had left nothing but good memories behind. We sat in their grey Mazda 3 for the final time, linked up with Ervina’s grandmother along the way, and drove to Perth International Airport.
There was a part of me that wished that there was only four of us at the airport. Maybe without Ervina’s relatives around, I might have actually expressed some emotions because I needed an outlet! I already knew that I was going to miss them both so much and even as I type this, I feel a heart-wrenching sensation at the core of my being. Beyond all the sights and sounds, this couple was undoubtedly the highlight of Perth and I’m glad Huiyi and I spent the bulk of our time in their endearing company.
I love those Love Birds so much more after this nine-day getaway and I’m sure it will be a good reunion when we do meet again. Lord, thank you for bringing me to Perth but more importantly, thank You for placing Chin Seng and Ervina in my life.
***
Darling, maybe someday
Forever I will stay
Lord knows that’s what I’m dreaming of
And I’m trying to find a way
But for now the wind keeps blowing
It carries me across the sea
So don’t you worry now, because
I carry you with me
I carry you with me
(“I Carry You With Me” | Tyler Burkum)
perth day 7: it doesn’t matter where we go or what we do.
Top: Fremantle, 2007 and Bottom: Fremantle, 2011
Incidentally, I intentionally and instinctively posed the same way at the same place!
At around this time 48 hours later, I’ll be onboard the plane back to Singapore. It’s been a great holiday. I shall make the most of it and try to get some rest tonight. I’ve enjoyed attending Ps Benny Ho’s church (Faith Community Church) this morning, heading to the Love Birds’ church (Christian City Church International), eating at Little Creatures Brewery, walking around Fremantle, visiting the Easter Markets, having dinner at Nishi Japanese Restaurant and hanging out at home… It typifies the kind of holiday I’ve enjoyed – agenda-less and without programme or structure. I absolutely needed something like this.
Amidst all the sights and sounds I took in today, I also made three observations:
- It doesn’t matter where you are located; as long as you’re beside the one you love.
- It doesn’t matter how funny you are; the one who loves you will laugh with you.
- It doesn’t matter what you say; the one whom you love hears what’s in your heart.
how you can be an effective marketplace evangelist.
A thousand apologies for the silence since the end of March. I’ve been completely swarmed, and this week looks like it’s going to be even crazier than the last. In the meantime, do enjoy an article I wrote for Eagles Vantage Point – a real privilege. Click here to see the online article, or just read on…
***
Generation Y Crusader!
The Y Generation hallmark
One distinguishing hallmark of the “Generation Y” young adult is his or her likelihood of switching jobs every other year. As I embark on the seventh year of my professional pilgrimage, I am privileged to have worked in the military, marketplace, and Christian ministry, in Singapore and Shanghai. Hence, I am inclined to associate myself with the ambitious yet fickle minded traits of my generation and our increasingly challenging landscape of being an active marketplace evangelist.
It is neither simple nor straightforward to shine for Jesus as a young adult in a progressively dark world. That said, I hope that my experiences and observations will encourage you to persevere as an ambassador of truth; I offer my thoughts on the intrinsic issues of having pride, maintaining integrity, leaving a legacy in the workplace, and how that may be linked to winning souls for Jesus.
My definition of “Marketplace Evangelism?” The intentional effort of ensuring that colleagues and business associates recognize your Christian faith and lifestyle through your choice of words, work attitude, and what fills your calendar after office hours. You should also deliberately and regularly attempt to minister the Gospel of Christ through the empowerment of the Holy Spirit during God appointed opportunities – the results are up to God but the effort is down to us.
Dealing with the evergreen issues of pride
You cannot escape it – how you deal with pride kicks off your first foray into the battlefield as a Christian in the marketplace. In my initial weeks in Shanghai, I adorned what my boss candidly referred to as, “The Typical Singaporean Mentality,” where I actually believed in my superiority over my Chinese counterparts.
I have repented, of course, but I remember feeling severely humbled when my supposedly inferior Administrative Manager demonstrated, with ease, how to negotiate both complicated Chinese laws and cunning Chinese businessmen with shrewdness; only then did I appreciate our vast differences and his vast experience. It was a sobering realization.
Regardless of positions or paychecks, we must carry in our suitcases an attitude to learn – from subordinates, peers, and superiors. After all, what do we have to lose except our repulsive and often obstructive pride? Observe what 1 Peter 5:5-6 (The Message) instructs, “…And you who are younger must follow your leaders. But all of you, leaders and followers alike, are to be down to earth with each other… So be content with who you are, and don’t put on airs.”
Displaying visible integrity in invisible places
I spent 21 months as a Marketing Manager in the alcoholic beverage industry in Shanghai. Sometimes, I had to accompany my boss to entertain clients at bars and nightclubs. In a (literally) dark place fraught with affordable sleaze, it becomes easy to forsake your Christian values, especially so if you are a visually stimulated, testosterone filled man. I recall a conversation with the twenty year old girl who was paid to host me – smack in the middle of our superficial chatter, I asked her, point blank, “Why are you doing this?” Rather than taking her home that night, I sincerely hope that she took home my probing question instead.
Temptation is real and it charges at us with alarming regularity. We must be aware of the different types of temptations in our various arenas of work. Fight the temptation of sluggishness and haphazard work; fight the temptation to abuse the privileges of position; fight the temptation of excessive occupational indulgences (like alcoholism); fight the temptation of a secret and decadent overseas lifestyle or when no one is observing.
Leaving behind a legacy of authenticity
Be true to yourself and stick to your convictions – pretending to be a good testimony is short lived and strenuous. I believe that it is acceptable to mess up occasionally or have fragments of bad attitude in the beginning; it is how you repent and recover from your mistakes that truly matter. I am persuaded that a non believer would find it more refreshing to see an imperfect believer making blunders and bettering himself from it.
A former Singapore Armed Forces colleague commended me for heading into full time ministry because it was something I had told them I would do eventually. And when he learnt that I am ministering in a church now, he spoke of the respect he had for me.
Let us not measure our successes by material achievements nor prestigious positions but by the unique footprints we leave behind. We must remember that our testimony is not what others think of us but what they think about Christ in us. I quote Steve Green in his timeless song, “May the footprints that we leave lead them to believe and the lives we live inspire them to obey. Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful.”
Getting the Church involved
The Church must teach her youths and young adults how to remain relevant instead of teaching them to be perfect religious snobs. What does it mean to be in the world but not of this world when sometimes their behavior and demeanor suggest that Christians are sometimes out of this world?
It is imperative for the Church to impart a humble spirit and a non judgmental attitude if she wants her people to reach the lost in their world. Believers must learn to write their own testimonies and be equipped to share it anytime and anywhere; they must also know when and how to step out of their comfort zone and to bring comfort to a society that is hurt, confused, and searching for more.
I have discovered that being available and meeting felt needs are the most effective ways of marketplace evangelism; and usually these two work in tandem – you should be available for them whenever they have needs. I encourage my young people to be sensitive to the prompting of the Holy Spirit whenever they converse with people, so that they are able to recognize when they should transit from a worldly dialogue into a spiritual conversation.
How would you describe yourself as a professional?
You should ask God for a personalized vision statement to anchor you at the marketplace!
Midway through my stint in Shanghai, my company instructed us to update our personal particulars and there was a field that read “Briefly describe yourself.” I struggled to describe myself without using John 15:5 or my life motto that was derived from it. Anything that was religious in nature would be irrelevant to my organization. I remember staring at the monitor with complete blankness. So I prayed and asked the Holy Spirit to inspire me.
Thirty minutes later, in one fell swoop, I penned a statement that would foreshadow the testimony that I would eventually leave behind: “I am a Bible believing Christian who desires to know God more by working excellently, learning earnestly while pursuing a God pleasing balanced lifestyle for the glory of God!”
Joey Asher Tan is a 27 year old Youth Minister with Grace Assembly of God Church, Singapore. He answered God’s call by heading into full time ministry in October 2009 and pastors 120 young people in the Grace Assembly of God (Bukit Batok) youth community.
The Y Generation hallmark
One distinguishing hallmark of the “Generation Y” young adult is his or her likelihood of switching jobs every other year. As I embark on the seventh year of my professional pilgrimage, I am privileged to have worked in the military, marketplace, and Christian ministry, in Singapore and Shanghai. Hence, I am inclined to associate myself with the ambitious yet fickle minded traits of my generation and our increasingly challenging landscape of being an active marketplace evangelist.
It is neither simple nor straightforward to shine for Jesus as a young adult in a progressively dark world. That said, I hope that my experiences and observations will encourage you to persevere as an ambassador of truth; I offer my thoughts on the intrinsic issues of having pride, maintaining integrity, leaving a legacy in the workplace, and how that may be linked to winning souls for Jesus.
My definition of “Marketplace Evangelism?” The intentional effort of ensuring that colleagues and business associates recognize your Christian faith and lifestyle through your choice of words, work attitude, and what fills your calendar after office hours. You should also deliberately and regularly attempt to minister the Gospel of Christ through the empowerment of the Holy Spirit during God appointed opportunities – the results are up to God but the effort is down to us.
Dealing with the evergreen issues of pride
You cannot escape it – how you deal with pride kicks off your first foray into the battlefield as a Christian in the marketplace. In my initial weeks in Shanghai, I adorned what my boss candidly referred to as, “The Typical Singaporean Mentality,” where I actually believed in my superiority over my Chinese counterparts.
I have repented, of course, but I remember feeling severely humbled when my supposedly inferior Administrative Manager demonstrated, with ease, how to negotiate both complicated Chinese laws and cunning Chinese businessmen with shrewdness; only then did I appreciate our vast differences and his vast experience. It was a sobering realization.
Regardless of positions or paychecks, we must carry in our suitcases an attitude to learn – from subordinates, peers, and superiors. After all, what do we have to lose except our repulsive and often obstructive pride? Observe what 1 Peter 5:5-6 (The Message) instructs, “…And you who are younger must follow your leaders. But all of you, leaders and followers alike, are to be down to earth with each other… So be content with who you are, and don’t put on airs.”
Displaying visible integrity in invisible places
I spent 21 months as a Marketing Manager in the alcoholic beverage industry in Shanghai. Sometimes, I had to accompany my boss to entertain clients at bars and nightclubs. In a (literally) dark place fraught with affordable sleaze, it becomes easy to forsake your Christian values, especially so if you are a visually stimulated, testosterone filled man. I recall a conversation with the twenty year old girl who was paid to host me – smack in the middle of our superficial chatter, I asked her, point blank, “Why are you doing this?” Rather than taking her home that night, I sincerely hope that she took home my probing question instead.
Temptation is real and it charges at us with alarming regularity. We must be aware of the different types of temptations in our various arenas of work. Fight the temptation of sluggishness and haphazard work; fight the temptation to abuse the privileges of position; fight the temptation of excessive occupational indulgences (like alcoholism); fight the temptation of a secret and decadent overseas lifestyle or when no one is observing.
Leaving behind a legacy of authenticity
Be true to yourself and stick to your convictions – pretending to be a good testimony is short lived and strenuous. I believe that it is acceptable to mess up occasionally or have fragments of bad attitude in the beginning; it is how you repent and recover from your mistakes that truly matter. I am persuaded that a non believer would find it more refreshing to see an imperfect believer making blunders and bettering himself from it.
A former Singapore Armed Forces colleague commended me for heading into full time ministry because it was something I had told them I would do eventually. And when he learnt that I am ministering in a church now, he spoke of the respect he had for me.
Let us not measure our successes by material achievements nor prestigious positions but by the unique footprints we leave behind. We must remember that our testimony is not what others think of us but what they think about Christ in us. I quote Steve Green in his timeless song, “May the footprints that we leave lead them to believe and the lives we live inspire them to obey. Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful.”
Getting the Church involved
The Church must teach her youths and young adults how to remain relevant instead of teaching them to be perfect religious snobs. What does it mean to be in the world but not of this world when sometimes their behavior and demeanor suggest that Christians are sometimes out of this world?
It is imperative for the Church to impart a humble spirit and a non judgmental attitude if she wants her people to reach the lost in their world. Believers must learn to write their own testimonies and be equipped to share it anytime and anywhere; they must also know when and how to step out of their comfort zone and to bring comfort to a society that is hurt, confused, and searching for more.
I have discovered that being available and meeting felt needs are the most effective ways of marketplace evangelism; and usually these two work in tandem – you should be available for them whenever they have needs. I encourage my young people to be sensitive to the prompting of the Holy Spirit whenever they converse with people, so that they are able to recognize when they should transit from a worldly dialogue into a spiritual conversation.
How would you describe yourself as a professional?
You should ask God for a personalized vision statement to anchor you at the marketplace!
Midway through my stint in Shanghai, my company instructed us to update our personal particulars and there was a field that read “Briefly describe yourself.” I struggled to describe myself without using John 15:5 or my life motto that was derived from it. Anything that was religious in nature would be irrelevant to my organization. I remember staring at the monitor with complete blankness. So I prayed and asked the Holy Spirit to inspire me.
Thirty minutes later, in one fell swoop, I penned a statement that would foreshadow the testimony that I would eventually leave behind: “I am a Bible believing Christian who desires to know God more by working excellently, learning earnestly while pursuing a God pleasing balanced lifestyle for the glory of God!”
Joey Asher Tan is a 27 year old Youth Minister with Grace Assembly of God Church, Singapore. He answered God’s call by heading into full time ministry in October 2009 and pastors 120 young people in the Grace Assembly of God (Bukit Batok) youth community.
why you should attend the church’s annual business meeting.
I have neither been instructed nor felt like it was my duty as a church employee to write this post; this is a completely voluntary and perhaps even purgatory entry as a result of my day-long dialogue with the Spirit about ABM.
On my way to school after the ABM dry run and briefing in GII, I recalled what it was like for me to attend ABM as a fresh-from-baptism-first-year-church-member. I anticipated it with excitement – partly due to novelty as a first-timer but mostly because I was acutely interested in the deeper workings of the church… It was after all, my church – the place I grew up in.
And this beginning conviction was something I needed to be reminded about today.
But truth be told. While I could only recognise 10% of the potential board members whom I had to vote for and was never a fan of the mandatory (and boring) graphs and numbers in the annual report, I did recognise the importance of my choices and acknowledged that I was indeed a big fan of my church.
I was intrigued by how their operations; I felt special knowing exclusive information before the everyone else did; I stopped nodding off when someone fires the occasional tough question; and of course, I get amused by how the pastors and board members attempt to reply, albeit awkwardly and sometimes even embarrassingly. The hot topic consistently seems to be how the church remunerates its pastors – somehow there’ll always be someone asking that question.
Well, for most of the youths (and especially those who are very young, new to the church or attending ABM for the first time), I honestly think this is how they will vote:
- Do I know him?
- Do I like his face?
- Do I know his children?
- Has he attended youth service before?
- Will he favour the youth ministry?
Maybe you’re a serious voter – good for you! – but that’s about as frank as it gets for me. At least that was how I voted the first time. Those board members with the 欠打 face or those who looked too serious never received my votes. Yes, I did pray before I cast my votes but it’s more of a “God, I hope this fella is the right chap!” than a “Oh Lord, open the skies and reveal Your choice to me!” Today of course, I know more than 50% of the board members, but come on, who was I kidding back then?
Nonetheless, whether I was an informed or ill-informed voter, I was still present and my vote made as big an impact as the gentleman who has been attending the church before I was born. With my votes, I represented my generation, my ministry and my personal convictions. I thank God that He knows the final verdict for every decision contested and I also thank God that I know I played a part in His plan. Without me, things might just turn out differently – not for the better or worse, just different.
If I may, I will make a sweeping statement here – I conclude that there were generally two types of church members: those who cared about their church and those who don’t. You can’t be in between. You can’t have conditions. Either you do, or you don’t. And how do I see the commitment in your heart? Very simple – by observing the choices that you have made.
This entry by the way, is not meant to prick your conscience. No, it’s an outcry of how the Spirit convicted my heart today. It was a necessary reminder of my role in the constitution of the church. Perhaps, just perhaps, you may be able to identify with me.
Let’s get excited about the direction of our beloved place of worship. Let’s get enthusiastic about making decisions that will shape our next generation. Let’s get energised about our church – after all, Jesus overcame death to build the church (Matthew 16:18)!
See you later at the 50th Annual Business Meeting – I can’t wait!
review of the unattainable girl, seven years later.
I found an interesting post which I wrote seven years ago and I thought it made for good reading. It’s regarding my dream girl – so impossible to find I called her the unattainable girl. Here’s how I described her…
- She shouldn’t just be a Christian. She must be in love with God so much she inspires me to fall even deeper in love with Him.
- A family person, because I am. I think being family oriented is of utmost importance.
- Has a kind-hearted nature. You know, the kind who will gladly help a granny cross the road, return a wallet, give up a seat, etc. She should have a big and generous heart!
- Doesn’t necessarily have to be pretty, but she must be beautiful. Get it?
- Her confidence should exude in the way she carries herself.
- Some girls have a glow… And some girls have a Jesus glow.
- I always believe a healthy body produces a healthy mind i.e. be physically fit. We can exercise together!
- Well, being patient and understanding are cliché traits to ask for, but when those are essential when it comes to dealing with me.
- Please do not be whiny… And please do not cry all the time… And please do not go “Sooooooo cute!!!” too often.
- Crazy about children, because I’m thrilled about them! I can’t wait to be a father!
- I hope she’s NOT taller than me. *hopes* I wanna look good beside her!
- Football is part of me, so it’d be great if it was part of her. This would be way cool but it won’t be important though. A bonus if she cheers for TeamR-AGE and Man Utd.
- Be ever so supportive of what I do and what I ought to do.
- Nice hair, eyes and complexion, because I don’t have these.
- A captivating smile to take my breath away, a tender touch to cool my hot-temper, a soothing voice to calm my kancheong-spider nature and an affectionate hug to assure me everything’s gonna be all right.
- Oh I certainly hope our conversations are filled with laughter, wit and genuinity. She should be capable of small talk and big talk too. Oh, and please pretend to be amused even when I start to say lame things… One day my mojo will run out. Hopefully only when I die.
- A lively and intelligent mind to stimulate the relationship and the conversations, and to always keep things fresh.
- Being sweet and thoughtful are lovely traits to have as well.
- She’s single, available and wants a long-term relationship? She’s a wife-to-be, not a girlfriend.
- She must not snore… Although this won’t be applicable during the initial years of courtship, but still…
- Last but not least… She loves me as much as I love her. Balance you know?
Sounds like a great deal? Haha. Maybe. Probably. Well, I know I definitely do not deserve a girl like this (if she even exists in the first place). But hey, I did not deserve Christ too. So, I won’t speak too soon… Optimism lights my path. Hehe…
So that was seven years ago, eons before I even set eyes on Huiyi… I thank God that she’s everything I want and need, and all that I am searching for. I may not be the best she knows or vice-versa, but I believe we’re the best for each other. I thank God for sending me Huiyi and if God-willing, I look forward to spending this lifetime with her. (:
Post script: I shall alter trait #21 in light of being with Huiyi. If you are searching for a girlfriend, please make sure that she inspires and motivates you to LOVE HER MORE THAN YOU LOVE YOURSELF BY SIMPLY BEING HERSELF. This was one of the factors that really drew me to Huiyi and she didn’t even need to do anything to attract me this way, except to be herself!
joey asher | misunderstoodsunshinekid 