Category Archives: In Your Face
Being authentic is one of my codes of conduct; I don’t want to be perfect, I just want to be real.
is your church still relevant to its community?
Recently, I had the privilege of hanging out with my key leaders from R-AGE @ GII and R-AGE @ GI at its respective planning retreats in iHotel @ Batam and Salvation Army @ Bukit Timah respectively. One of the activities I led them in as part of an evaluation exercise was to list down every programme that our youth group had embarked on in the last year – from cell groups, to youth services, to conferences, to regional outings, to Christmas parties, to Easter productions, to ministry meetings, and to church retreats; I wanted a comprehensive laundry list of everything that had taken place in our ministry. Both sides did this with relative ease and easily came up with 40-50 (!) programmes. Yes, we were stunned by the sheer number of programmes.
That was our first epiphany.
Next, I got us to sort out these programmes into only one of these three categories(, which I called the “WEB” for easy recall):
- Win: evangelistic or pre-evangelistic in nature.
- Equip: trains and ups the level of leaders and members.
- Build: grows and fortifies the fellowship of the believers.
Both sides arrived at similar results – on average, less than 15% were Win programmes, another 15% were Equip programmes and approximately 70% of what we had planned and executed were predominately Build programmes. Needless to say, my leaders were flabbergasted; they shared my same reaction when I completed this exercise myself at the beginning of the year. I also told them to consider how a Win programme would naturally include Equip elements and inevitably Build the youth group.
That was our second epiphany.
What I got us to do next was to name as many known felt needs as we could of the respective communities we were ministering in; R-AGE @ GI and R-AGE @ GII had obviously listed different needs based on the demographics of its vicinity – we’d be foolish to plan and execute similar programmes for an affluent Tanglin community as we would the heartland Bukit Batok community. I told them to think about the needs that their sheep had and to their (and my) astonishment, some of my leaders struggled to even name these needs because they weren’t cognisant of it. Bottom-line was, we do not really understand the felt needs of our respective communities (and honestly, we ought to be chagrined by this).
That was our third epiphany.
Next, with the list of needs we barely were able to list down from the previous segment, I got us to match it with the programmes that we had planned and executed in the last year. It was awkward for us because we struggled to do this matching exercise properly; when we did find a match, it wasn’t an entirely convincing conclusion. The question that I fired at us was, “So, how does R-AGE meet the needs of the community it exists in?”
That was our fourth epiphany.
It was only after four self-discovered epiphanies that I released us to proceed with the budgeting and programme-planning exercise. I told them that it was imperative that these four revelations formed the backdrop in their minds before they strategised for 2012.
Without mincing my words, I told them that it is pointless if a youth group isn’t able to serve the students in its community; similarly, a church becomes useless if it doesn’t value add to the community it exists in. What’s the point of establishing a church if all it does is to exist for itself? It would end up becoming a self-serving community that is completely irrelevant to its neighbourhood. (I’m embarrassed to say this but the truth is that most times, a community centre meets the needs of its community more effectively than a church does, and it should never be that way!)
Some sobering questions a church (any church!) must ask itself are:
- Does the neighbourhood know the existence of the church?
- Does the church even meet the needs of its neighbourhood?
- Is the church serving the neighbourhood effectively?
- Is the church making a difference in the neighbourhood?
- Would it matter at all to the neighbourhood if the church suddenly disappears?
So, is your church still relevant to its community? I’m not sure about you, but I want to ensure that my ministry is.
With that conviction (hopefully) drilled into my leaders’ hearts, I am hopeful that the programmes that they have dreamed of for 2012 would have a greater relevance to (and impact on) the youths in both Tanglin and Bukit Batok. Otherwise, we’re really wasting our time, energy and resources doing what we do. Let’s get real and stop kidding ourselves.
If we are irrelevant, we are useless. If we do not contribute, we should cease to exist. If we are not even meeting their felt needs, then why would young people even want to join our youth group? Come on, we must have a vision that is bigger than ourselves!
R-AGE must never be a feel good club – certainly not on my watch!
one day in the 40 days of community.
Post-script: My apologies to Ps Kieran Chew for publishing this entry only now… It was in my drafts since 3rd June, but the madness of June overwhelmed me, and this article got forgotten… Well, Ps Kieran, you’re right, “It’s no longer news”, but hey, it’s still newsworthy, at least on my blog it is. HAHA! Hope this works for you! (:
Credits to Matthew Tan for his good work in putting this video together.
About a two month[s] ago, the full-time staff at Grace AG embarked on its Home Improvement Project (HIP) as part of its internal 40 Days of Community (40DOC). This campaign is an initiative launched by (the Deputy Senior Pastor) Ps Calvin Lee, and is set to be launched church-wide in July-August in a strategic effort to bring the church together. It is adapted from Rick Warren’s programme (of the same title) that has been tried and tested with positive results, first in Saddleback Church, then in many other churches worldwide.
I’m not sure if I was alone in feeling this way, but honestly, I had to rummage my heart for enthusiasm for this project because it certainly didn’t come naturally from the onset. It was an acquired taste of sorts – the more you did it, the more you enjoyed it. I enjoyed Ps Cuixian’s leadership of my group as well as getting to know some of my colleagues (like Andrew Tai and Edmund Quek, who were great fun to be with) a little better.
My 40DOC began with the devotional series in the accompanying book, “Better Together”, which I hope most of you will purchase. If something could fire me up, it would definitely be the Word and its practicable outcomes. Coming together weekly to watch Rick Warren (who incidentally looks like a cross between a tour guide and a taxi driver – no offence – he has such a down-to-earth look about him!) on DVD was also refreshing – he has an uncanny ability to simplify biblical themes into instantly applicable aphorisms. Speakers (like Edmund Chan, Peter Chao and Benny Ho) with that ability always get my attention.
HIP was definitely the highlight of 40DOC. It required us to literally move out of our comfort zones, put our money where our mouths are and to get down and dirty with our hands and feet. (Clichés, I know, but definitely used in the right context.) I shall offer some honest observations of my day spent with over 10 other full-time staff; I don’t enjoy giving Sunday School answers anyway. Allow me to share these thoughts through 5 C’s.
Complaints
No matter how old you are, what species of gender you belong to, and regardless of whether you’re a church staff (even if you are a pastor), you will still have a tendency to complain. It’s a sickening and disgusting part of our wretched human nature and I caught myself at it. Of course, I tried to mask it under the cloak of humour but I could never hide it from my inner man if I was frank with myself. I was rather put off by some the apparently “harmless” and “honest” negative remarks that floated around the room. Sometimes, it is good not to say anything if you indeed have nothing good to say.
This alone I think, humbles the greatest of saints – even if they were ordained by a board of holy people! Our fallen state truly requires the infallible grace of God. Help us shine for You, Lord, simply by not complaining!
Contribution
From the way I see it, there are three ways a person could contribute in HIP – either by offering your time, energy or resources. I took a backseat (as there were enough leaders) for this project and I knew I had to leave a couple of hours earlier than the rest, so I wanted to make up for it by chipping in with a little more money. I gave an amount as the Lord put upon my heart to – this was my act of obedience. However, to my surprise, I received (almost) the entire sum back as we did not need to spend as much as we had budgeted for the house. So I decided to channel that sum into the weekend’s offering bags.
The bottom-line of what I want to say is that, due the complexity of planning and the complicated layers of coordination, this HIP might just be the first and last one for you and I; and if that’s the case, what’s there to lose by going all out?
Conditioning
If anyone told you that painting a house was easy – tell him to go paint another one. I regretted not taking before-and-after photographs of the house we helped to transform. Before we could give it a face-lift, we had to give it a face-off. Peeling and scraping the ancient paint off both the walls and the ceiling were a mammoth task in itself. Try arching your neck upwards for an entire morning in an unventilated and weird-smelling room and having every fifth of ten scrapes feel like a fork scratching a blackboard… Can you feel and imagine the icky sensation in your mind’s eye? And speaking of eye, you also had to battle with fragments of dried paint and cement flakes with each blink.
I felt like I burnt more calories than a regular workout and received a good toning on especially my arms, but it was the conditioning of my heart and mind that I truly appreciated from this experience.
Currency
If ever there was a cry that screams from within my heart as a shepherd of people (i.e. a pastor), it would be how I want to aggressively avoid being irrelevant to society. (No disrespect to anyone here, but) I felt sad to have heard some conversations that transpired in the one-room flat, between some of my colleagues and the home-owner we were helping. It was dismal to see how they were unable to converse on the same frequency because one has obviously lost touch with the harsher dimensions of society. Forgive me, for I know this is a quick, harsh and judgmental assessment (and I apologise for it if it stumbles you) but a part of me fiercely rejects an innate incapability to relate with the felt needs of the man-on-the-street. It would almost be ironic for a pastor to arrive at that state.
In the same breath, I will say that this applies to anyone who calls himself a Christian. How relevant are you to society? Are you so far-removed that you can no longer relate to those less-fortunate? HIP is a good way to get reconnected.
Collaboration
The saying goes, “Tough times make tough men” and as a staff team, we have not and do not go through anything tough as a collective; this HIP was enforced (as a professional obligation) and emblematic at best (we had to lead by example before we could encourage our sheep to do it), hence it already prepared and toughened us up psychologically before execution. Nonetheless, the beautiful thing about going through something uncomfortable, unconventional and uncommon like that was that it forced us to forge teamwork. And I reckon this category of teamwork (honed through hardship) is a little more cohesive than organising a church event or attending a staff retreat together.
I am confident that embarking on HIP together, be it as a cell group or a real family unit, will only serve to strengthen the existing bonds that are holding the body of believers together. This may just take your cell and your family to the next level.
***
It is quite unlike me to blog about something that I do not believe in, or write something here out of professional obligations. And so, I shall not. But hey, I have already written nearly 1,500 words on this upcoming 40DOC – perhaps this is a telling indication of my optimism towards this campaign.
I believe in it not because of its proven track record, programme or content – that’s just hype. No, I believe in it because I serve a big God who desires to unite His church. Like I mentioned it over the pulpit two weeks ago, I firmly believe that 40DOC isn’t just going to be another campaign, but THE defining campaign for Grace AG.
I bought home three things from HIP – a photo frame, a certificate and a recap sheet – but I took home so much more, if you know what I mean. I urge you to allow 40DOC to become a part of you. After all, what do you have to lose?
meeting the folks who made the youths.
(Post-script: I had actually written an entry twice as long as this one but WordPress killed it when I tried to save it. So I shall not attempt to regurgitate the original content, but share what I think is most necessary to be read.)
60 minutes. 48 slides. 40 parents. 14 Shepherds. 1 heck of a session. (:
About a month ago, I tweeted this:
Just had an amazing lunch session with another youth pastor and I think I may have found the solution to unite the church as a family! Wooh!
Today, I think the youth ministry took one step closer to realising that vision. And it has everything to do with putting young people together with fathers and mothers.
If you were at R-AGE @ GII’s from 5pm-7pm today, you would have seen me beaming to no end. No, I was not delighted because the team or I have done a good job (though I believe we have!); I was not happy because of the turn-out or the parents’ unexpected responses; instead, I rejoiced because of two things:
- I remained obedient to the vision that God put in my heart about a year ago to network with the parents of my young people, and successfully brought it to pass in the ministry today.
- The session today affirmed my appreciation of the “Family” element in the Grace AG “DNA” and I tapped on it to potentially bring the youth ministry (and maybe the entire church) to the next level.
Not many people know this, but if there was a group of people who I am most reluctant to be with, it would have to be fathers, and to a lesser extent, mothers. Perhaps it is because I do not normally interact with them; or because I did not grow up with a fatherly figure; or because there is a generational gap caused by age; or because I think they secretly scrutinise and criticise the youth ministry; or because I think they have no interest in what I have to say to them; or simply because I do not have much to offer them with my limited life experiences.
However, much to my pleasant surprise, they were not just a receptive group of adults but also an uplifting bunch. I invited them to give us feedback and here are some of their suggestions (and affirmation):
Good session – cleared some doubts. Organise some teens-parents bonding session?
Encourage leaders to communicate with parents if they should notice inconsistent behaviour.
Keep parents posted on the cell material so that the topics could be discussed in the family.
We would avail ourselves as a couple to listen to and help the youths and even their parents.
Host a cell group [at my house] – need not be a cell my child is in.
You guys have done a great job in nurturing the kids in their teenage years especially in their spiritual growth and character building. Keep it up!
And this takes the cake – it made me beam as brightly as a thousand suns:
I am so proud to be a parent of R-AGErs who have grown and matured through this amazing ministry. Keep up the good work! Phil 1:6
Off the top of my head, here are the 10 things I would like to thank God for:
- I expected a turn-out of 20 but nearly 40 parents showed up today.
- I expected a bored, restless and uninterested group but I saw genuine enthusiasm as they participated in the ice-breaking activity and patiently sat through the hour-long ministry update.
- I wished I got a dollar every time I saw a parent nod his or her head with me in agreement.
- I took the risk to give Keith and Yixian the opportunity to (re)present the cell and service elements respectively and they have exceeded everyone’s expectations of them – I am so proud of my beloved proteges!
- I thought Melody and Bradley did a superb job at organising this event with limited time and resources.
- I saw a beautiful scene of “Family” at the ground floor after the session – teenagers, youth leaders and parents freely mingling and chatting with each other over dinner. That’s precisely what a family church is all about!
- I was surprised to see how genuinely keen these parents were to be a part of what R-AGE did, does and will do.
- I could almost see it in their eyes that this session was like an answered prayer for them.
- I expected a tricky Question-and-Answer session but I ended up receiving generous words of encouragement from two fathers. I also received an insight into the real fears, struggles and concerns of parents with teenage children.
- It was beyond my wildest imagination to see at least 35 parents responding to my pseudo “altar call” of committing to being a secret prayer warrior for the youth ministry and its young people.
I shall not go into the details of what transpired today because I do not want to let the cat out of the bag… (: But if you are really keen to find out what happened, here’s all you need to know, whether you are a parent or a teenager:
- We now have one parent committed to interceding for one R-AGE @ GII GGL (who’s not related to them) for six months.
- We made history today by organising the inaugural Meet-The-Folks session; as far as I can remember in my 14 years in Grace AG, and confirmed by parents who have been in Grace AG for more than two decades, this was definitely the first time something like this has happened. And we were all most grateful for it.
- We are all looking forward to the next Meet-The-Folks session, perhaps at the end of the year.
- We have a bunch of parents who sincerely desire to make a greater contribution in their teenagers’ life and ministry.
- We are on the threshold of a new culture being established in Grace AG – championed by its young people.
I love my church… part 1.
Probably our favourite photograph together, taken at the inaugural Rhema in 2006.
I have arrived at the 18th month of my journey with Grace AG and it has been an eye-opening experience. A perfect church doesn’t exist and Grace AG is no different; there are cracks and weaknesses in my church, just like there are in yours. (I’m throwing the “This-is-not-your-church-this-is-His-church” cliche out of the window – I’m not here to quibble over semantics.) But not everyone, be it a salaried minister or a serving member, will dare to make this statement:
“I love my church.”
And I’ve been privileged enough to meet men and women whom I’m confident will dare to make that statement – Lionel, Joel and Suhui, just to name a few. As for my colleagues, I only have superficial knowledge of the majority of them but I do have intimate knowledge of one man – Ps Ronald. And I know he loves his church. His passion for Grace AG has rubbed off not just on me, but on many others who have crossed his path.
One reason why I look toward Ps Ronald as a role model is that he is a home-grown pastor. (Sidetrack, but I humbly think that we need more home-grown ministers!) This man was once a rebellious teenager; he once served as a Sunday School superintendent; and I believe that in his 12 years serving full-time in Grace AG as a youth pastor, he has stepped on many toes in the name of advancing the church. I believe that all good leaders have an insatiable appetite to improve their organisation with whatever influence they have. Their attitude is always exemplary and inspirational. After all, attitude reflect leadership (Julius Campbell).
I am a passionate person and I am not ashamed of the way I communicate. A couple of days ago, I enjoyed a heated phone conversation with Ps Ronald; it was almost cathartic to have these occasional dialogues. No, we didn’t quarrel. I doubt we’ve ever quarreled outrightly. I love and respect him too much to fight against him. He has over the years led me by example and proven that he is fighting alongside me. You must have heard me say this time and again – everyone has a hero of faith and Ps Ronald is in my hall of fame.
I brought to him a couple of issues that were tussling in my head in an open and honest manner. And I didn’t mince my words. There aren’t many people who can convincingly tell me, “I know where you are coming from”, and have me believe them. And there aren’t many people who can make me feel like they’ve really heard what I had to say and understood every word of it. Ps Ronald is one of the few who can cut it with me.
I put down the phone and sent him a follow-up text:
Bro, sorry if I sounded rude or disrespectful. I do get carried away and am passionate in my arguments. Trust you know it’s nothing personal. I’m challenging the policy, not the person.
His candid response made me beam with pride – for who doesn’t want to be a reflection of their role model? This was what he replied verbatim:
Yes, miniature Ronald. Hahahaha. You brought up a good point…
And the rest I shall omit… Well, you may not make heads or tails of what Ps Ronald and I exchanged but that was a significant moment for me, even though he has affirmed me time and again that I remind him of himself when he first started out in ministry. I believe that there are many others on the staff team who are like Ps Ronald and I – people who love the church and want to see it grow and change for the better.
Are you an old-timer harping on the church’s distinguished history?
Let the young ones show you how much they will love the church!
Are you a young person discouraged by the church’s dismal destiny?
Let the older folks show you how much they still love the church!
My rhetoric to you tonight is – “Do you love your church?”
God knows the answer in your heart and Man will know the answer by your fruit.
No, Grace AG isn’t just my place of employment.
It is home – my home – and I will fiercely protect it.
JAT reads in end-March.
May you enjoy these articles as much as I have.
- Amos Poh provides a glimpse into a teenager’s struggles and earnest desire to pray.
- Chua Yi Xian shares a psychologist-to-be’s tussle with relativism and Christianity.
- Evangeline Tan represent a daughter’s sincere cry for real communion with her father.
- Hilary Hoe walks us through the Book of Revelation as part of his Lenten journey.
- Lim Mei Yin talks us through her thoughts on God talking to us and how we hear Him.
- Matt Lawton interviews the entertaining Patrice Evra, whose honesty charms us all.
- Matthew Tan gives us a theological perspective of community and its importance.
- Michael Walker highlights unfulfilled potential by juxtaposing Rooney and Jeffers.
- Perry Noble diagnoses with alarming accuracy the signs of an unhealthy Christian.
- Serene Wee spells out the ten desired qualities of a godly man – her unattainable one.
I don’t like telling God how good people say I am.
One of the many lessons I caught from EC was this: “You bring both criticisms and compliments before the Lord.”
It’s easy to go to God when you feel either discouraged by people’s negative comments or disappointed by a poor decision made. It’s only natural that during these times we turn our eyes to Jesus to look at His wonderful face in light of our woeful situations. After all, our God is a God who comforts and we will find many instances of Scripture which assures us of this attribute of God.
It is the other part that we often struggle to bring before God. Well, for me at least – I know I frequently resist letting God screen the compliments that people feed me. How foolish and conceited I have been!
I believe that you can test a man’s competence and calibre by watching him through tests and trials. But if you want to test a man’s true character and source of confidence, you only need to give him power and popularity. The maxim stands true: absolute power corrupts absolutely.
God has been faithful to me by constantly putting great people around me – those who believe in me and affirm the things I do. While I am grateful for these necessary sources of encouragement, I have now become acutely aware of its accompanying dangers too. I am certain that as I grow in capabilities and capacities, compliments will continue to surround me. Don’t get me wrong – I won’t shun it or play the modesty game. No, I’ll present it before the Lord instead and ask Him to help me discern it.
I must not believe my own hype; I must not be deceived by people’s hyperbole; I must not achieve a state of haughtiness. Oh Lord, help me to conceive humility! Seek not the applause of men but the approval of God – I must live out this axiom and find true security in God alone. Yes, humility, integrity and sufficiency must indeed come together.
Fill me with your wisdom, oh Lord, and give me an insatiable appetite to seek true humility. May the only thing I boast about be what Christ has done for me on the cross of Calvary!
Henceforth, I shall commit to my Creator both criticisms and compliments so that my convictions are continuously corrected and my character is constantly changed for the sake of Christ! Apart from Jesus, I can do nothing; I am absolutely nothing without Christ. What a sobering statement.
why you should attend the church’s annual business meeting.
I have neither been instructed nor felt like it was my duty as a church employee to write this post; this is a completely voluntary and perhaps even purgatory entry as a result of my day-long dialogue with the Spirit about ABM.
On my way to school after the ABM dry run and briefing in GII, I recalled what it was like for me to attend ABM as a fresh-from-baptism-first-year-church-member. I anticipated it with excitement – partly due to novelty as a first-timer but mostly because I was acutely interested in the deeper workings of the church… It was after all, my church – the place I grew up in.
And this beginning conviction was something I needed to be reminded about today.
But truth be told. While I could only recognise 10% of the potential board members whom I had to vote for and was never a fan of the mandatory (and boring) graphs and numbers in the annual report, I did recognise the importance of my choices and acknowledged that I was indeed a big fan of my church.
I was intrigued by how their operations; I felt special knowing exclusive information before the everyone else did; I stopped nodding off when someone fires the occasional tough question; and of course, I get amused by how the pastors and board members attempt to reply, albeit awkwardly and sometimes even embarrassingly. The hot topic consistently seems to be how the church remunerates its pastors – somehow there’ll always be someone asking that question.
Well, for most of the youths (and especially those who are very young, new to the church or attending ABM for the first time), I honestly think this is how they will vote:
- Do I know him?
- Do I like his face?
- Do I know his children?
- Has he attended youth service before?
- Will he favour the youth ministry?
Maybe you’re a serious voter – good for you! – but that’s about as frank as it gets for me. At least that was how I voted the first time. Those board members with the 欠打 face or those who looked too serious never received my votes. Yes, I did pray before I cast my votes but it’s more of a “God, I hope this fella is the right chap!” than a “Oh Lord, open the skies and reveal Your choice to me!” Today of course, I know more than 50% of the board members, but come on, who was I kidding back then?
Nonetheless, whether I was an informed or ill-informed voter, I was still present and my vote made as big an impact as the gentleman who has been attending the church before I was born. With my votes, I represented my generation, my ministry and my personal convictions. I thank God that He knows the final verdict for every decision contested and I also thank God that I know I played a part in His plan. Without me, things might just turn out differently – not for the better or worse, just different.
If I may, I will make a sweeping statement here – I conclude that there were generally two types of church members: those who cared about their church and those who don’t. You can’t be in between. You can’t have conditions. Either you do, or you don’t. And how do I see the commitment in your heart? Very simple – by observing the choices that you have made.
This entry by the way, is not meant to prick your conscience. No, it’s an outcry of how the Spirit convicted my heart today. It was a necessary reminder of my role in the constitution of the church. Perhaps, just perhaps, you may be able to identify with me.
Let’s get excited about the direction of our beloved place of worship. Let’s get enthusiastic about making decisions that will shape our next generation. Let’s get energised about our church – after all, Jesus overcame death to build the church (Matthew 16:18)!
See you later at the 50th Annual Business Meeting – I can’t wait!
joey asher | misunderstoodsunshinekid 