Category Archives: Quote & Unquote
There’s an abundance of wisdom out there; this is my attempt to be learned by borrowing some of it for personal perusal.
pardon the movie title, but this was my best friend’s wedding.
Most of you know that my best friend got married today. And since I was their best man, I had the honour of giving a speech. I say that it is an honour because they have given me 10-15 minutes of the most significant and important event of their lives thus far. Thinking about it humbles me greatly. Well, regarding the speech, I enjoyed delivering it and honestly, I thought it was well-delivered; people were kind and generous with their encouragement and that gave me a huge boost too. More importantly, I thought I managed to nail what I had intended to say to the couple, and more specifically to LK.
I think there were two lines in the speech that seem to have caught everyone’s attention and so for the sake of downloading it to my digital memory, I shall share it here.
“… This is the best friend who has given me the privilege to be his best man; and I actually think that I can be his best man because first and foremost, he has been and is the best man in my life…”
“… There’s an old wedding joke about rings; before the wedding – engagement ring; during the wedding – wedding ring; after the wedding – suffering. Well, I have my own version. I’m praying that the two of them would be enduring, restoring, and since this speech is for the groom, maybe a few more diamond rings…”
I knocked out at 2:30am, got up at 6am and spent the entire day playing the role of a personal assistant and time-keeper for LK. I’m comprehensively exhausted. On hindsight, after being involved with so many weddings, this wedding is one that would definitely be closest to my heart – simply because it’s my best friend’s wedding; as I watched the event unfold, I found myself nearly in tears as I prayed in my seat and gave thanks to God for the work that He’s done with the two of them. I shall conclude this short post with a poem I wrote nearly a decade ago, specially for newlyweds.
Wedded
By Joey Asher TanBefore me stands a beautiful bride;
Her groom gleams in radiant pride.
A big day, a grand day,
A wonderful day; it is today.
Smiles aplenty, hugs and kisses,
Both enter a stage where one turns a missus.
Unaware what lies before them,
Tests and trials and even small exams.
But one thing I know that will shine through:
It is, “Our love for me and you”.
I say a prayer for them right now,
That God turns all their frowns to smiles.
Beautiful bride, submit to your man;
And may the man stick to God’s plans.
You haven’t married a person you could live with;
You’ve married a person you couldn’t live without.
May God bless you and keep your home,
Now that you’ve found your matrimonial dome.
And now I see a beautiful wife,
Her husband revels in glorious pride.
the stream versus the rock – who wins?
I just returned home from a very late night chat, which I thoroughly enjoyed, with XY, because I was able to share from the bottom of my heart, and to let him see for himself the fire in my eyes with regards to my future. I also felt privileged as he shared a part of his life I’d never thought I’d hear. It was an open, honest, vulnerable and hugely satisfying conversation. I’m thank God for sending a brother like him into my life. It’s quite amazing how God connects in seamless tandem two individuals with vastly different upbringings, ideals, religious beliefs, values, dreams and decision-making models – not to mention our love-hate interest for each other’s football team (though that was not mentioned tonight). I even shared a little of my faith with him, why I love God (and how that is everything to me), and how I earnestly pray for his salvation. One day, he will know God.
As such, I’m unable to write a comprehensive article tonight. I don’t even know how to title this post. I do, however, would like to share two thoughts that have been tossing in my head the entire day. One stems from a quote and the other is how I approach my relationship with HY and why I think our love for each other is burning so strongly.
“In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins – not through strength but by perseverance.” – H. Jackson Brown
And the other is simply how the Holy Spirit reminded me that the only way to love HY unconditionally and more everyday, is to love God even more and as my first priority. Humanly, it’d be impossibly to do so – both ways.
let us never patronise God.
If I were hungry I would not tell you,
For the world is Mine, and all it contains.
– Psalm 50:12 (New American Standard Version)
This is one verse in the Bible that severely humbles me every time I read it; it keeps me on my toes because I’d never want to patronise God and offer Him mere lip service. Do I really think that the omniscient and omnipresent God doesn’t know what’s truly in my heart, beneath every word and deed? Who am I kidding? There’s no hiding from Him my insides. Each time I revisit this verse, I force myself to examine my private worship – for that determines the authenticity and power of my public worship. I’ve always believed that spiritual authority comes from time spent with God.
How can we even offer God something that He already has? What exactly is God hungry for? I’d like to believe that He is hungry for your praise and worship, devotion and thanksgiving, and your prayer and supplication. This sound extremely far-fetched but the truth is, God is after His own glory. And when you give Him the glory that is rightfully due to Him – I borrow JP’s thoughts – you are completely satisfied; it’s a place of gratification that nothing on earth can take, to know that you’re in the will of God.
Praise magnifies God’s being. Magnification isn’t making the subject bigger, but enlarging the subject in your perspective. Faith magnifies God’s doing. When God plays a bigger role in your life, the enemy and yourself plays a smaller role. That is why when you are in trouble, you ought to worship God, so that your faith can be built and that your perspective can be straightened out through God. And like the song we are so acquainted with, “Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of this earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.”
Our response then, in the light of this verse, is to be a worshipper – one who directs and diverts the glory to God. And I believe, as absurd as this next expression may sound, that this is how we should feed God. Then maybe, God might speak to us; perhaps this is why we conventionally have a time of praise and worship before we hear God’s Word through a sermon. Worship is like ploughing the ground and the Word is like the seed being planted.
Hence, don’t be a casual worshipper if you want God to speak to you. Remember, God doesn’t need you to worship Him, so do not offer half-hearted worship – it has to be wholehearted, nothing less! If He was hungry, He wouldn’t even tell you. After all, the whole world (including you and I) already belongs to Him.
“Speak to me / And tell me all the things I need to know / I want to hear You now / (Can You) speak to me / I’ve opened up Your Word to free me / I want to hear You now” – Audio Adrenaline
the big time and the small time.
During the peak of an event that I was a part of, some 30 minutes before it started, the organiser stormed into the room and blew her head off at all the seemingly inconsequential matters. She lost her cool and threw unnecessary tantrums to and in front of everyone. My colleague simply commented, “这种人,做不了大事” (direct translation – this kind of person, cannot accomplish big things). I couldn’t help but agree with his harsh and cruel but very accurate assessment!
Looking back at all the different people I’ve worked with, I realise that I can somehow tell how successful a person is and can be simply by observing how he handles his roles and responsibilities, or by how he responds to stress. To an extent, those who cannot undertake major events are usually those who will crumble when the going gets tough. One man whom I really admire is my uncle and former boss, AT. I cannot find a better word other than “Hero” to describe him; his problem-solving and stress-taking abilities are nonpareil and I really look up to him in that aspect.
Assessing a person based on his capacities to manage pressure is not a fatalistic way of evaluation, but it certainly is one way you could analyse him. Of course it’s always easier to just do what you’re comfortable with and prepared for, so naturally it’s the unexpected that truly tests a person’s competence to cope with the bigger things in life. At least for me it indicates the stage that one can operate on and how big it can get.
Don’t misunderstand me – there’s nothing wrong if you’re only able to handle a small platform at this point of your life. The question is, are you even able to handle that platform? I reckon that discontentment, disappointment and disillusionment will set in when a small-platform person desires and covets a big stage that he cannot handle (and vice versa). So, how aware are you of how and what you are built for?
I guess we’ll figure out the answer to this million-dollar question as we progress through life and figure out the answers while we discover how much we can actually manoeuvre. So remember that one sign of your threshold to handle big matters is simply how you complain about small matters. I remember the three key lessons from KK’s excellent lesson during the leaders’ retreat – do not complain (about your situation), do not justify (your actions) and take responsibility (for yourself).
my journey into full-time ministry.
Before I headed for Shanghai, I told my uncle that I was reconsidering his offer because I was actually first considering heading into full-time work with church. He thought I was crazy. “Why you want to become a monk so early in your life!?”, was his candid retort, and his limited understanding of what working in church was like – a monastery. Of course, my mother disapproved my desire to work as a youth minister then, so I reluctantly headed to Shanghai instead.
I didn’t enjoy it at first, but God is good. Within six months, I got the hang of it, overcame the dread of being there unwillingly, made a ton of friends, settled in a cell group and began to excel in my job. When I decided to end my 21-month Shanghai chapter last July, my former colleagues were shocked when they found out that I went to work in church. They thought it was a waste of my talent and that I was too young for a job like this; they basically thought I was crazy to abandon a comfortable lifestyle for something so radical.
Of course, they had no prior knowledge of my journey with the Lord. Not many people know of my promise to God – that I’d give Him the best years of my career (which I think is now). I don’t know how long, far or intense this full-time calling is, but I know it is NOW. And my only response is not to trust and obey but to obey then to trust. Hence, tonight, I felt led to publish my cover letter to Grace Assembly of God. May my journey into full-time ministry inspire and encourage you, as well as to give you a glimpse of my conviction and surrender to God regarding this part and period of my life. Enjoy the read.
And just for the record, my mum didn’t just agree to me heading into full-time work, she actually supported it! Praise the Lord for answering a three-year prayer. The story of how she came to this miraculous decision deserves to be mentioned on a separate entry.


