Category Archives: Picture Perfect

A picture unveils a thousand words and a photograph reveals emotion; life is digitalised by a kaleidoscope of pixels.

a reward the world could never give.

I’ve got another confession to make and tonight this confession turns into a testimony of God’s faithfulness and goodness in my life. My spirit has truly been lifted up!

At the beginning of March, after the REAL 2010 graduation ceremony, I plunged into what I’d call, “Ministry Depression” for a couple of weeks. I remember telling RY, LK and HY how disappointed I was with my beloved REAL 2010 alumni. No, it wasn’t because they weren’t outstanding because they are, but very humanly speaking, I was deeply sad that after two months of investing my life into theirs, I received nothing in return except for handshakes, verbal appreciations and SMS encouragements.

Now, I’m being extremely honest here and I choose to spill my heart because there’s a an important lesson behind it. To be frank, I was expecting more from them; I know I’m not supposed to expect anything – after all, that’s what I’ve been teaching them the last two months – but I am being really human here; I remember telling myself, “You mean, that’s it? This is all I’m getting from the 16 of you after I poured my life into you? Wow. Thanks a lot”. Then I reclused into my own melancholic orbit and I convinced myself to quickly move on from this disappointment. I even wanted to harden my heart to them so that I will not allow myself to be hurt like that again. I’ve always openly declared that I’m a secret melancholy and this perpetuated it. My REAL champs may not have realised it because (I think) I’ve camouflaged it well, but I remember responding to them in a curt and cold manner that was very uncharacteristic of me. Some of my youths think that I’m superhuman because that’s the facade that I project but truth be told, I’m really just an ordinary human being with normal affection and affirmation needs as well.

There was little I could do really, except to talk to God and to let Him deal with me. I retreated into my own prayer closet and I came clean with God. I told Him exactly how I felt about how REAL ended and I asked Him to help me to overcome this disappointment by His grace. (This was before I spoke to my mentor, best friend and girlfriend.) I was rebelliously stubborn and I mentally rejected the scriptures that the Holy Spirit brought to my mind. I didn’t want to hear any “holy-moley-sunday-school-ten-year-series” consolation. And I shut my emotions away. But the more I dissected my heart before God, the more painful it was. A pruning process isn’t pleasant indeed. At the end of my emotional and spiritual tussle, the Holy Spirit led me to two scriptures, in this order:

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.” – Psalm 51:17

“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men.” – Colossians 3:23

I am convinced that when the Lord ministers to you, you will be comforted. God is faithful and before He rebuked me, He gently let me know that it was all right to think like that and to feel that way, through Psalm 51:17. I just wanted to bare my heart before the Lord and I found great assurance in His divine embrace.

Once the Lord met my emotional needs, He began to address my thinking by pointing me to Colossians 3:23. I repented before the Lord for my poor attitude and mentality that were in the wrong places and I asked Him to give me new lenses to appreciate this situation. I determined it in my heart to continue to love my young people, regardless of whether affirmation was present or not, simply because God loves them and has compelled me to do likewise; I am doing this because I love them – nothing more, nothing less; I wasn’t going to allow a lack of encouragement to stop me from fulfilling my calling to be a youth pastor. This was a test that I had to overcome and by God’s grace I knew that I would overcome it. It was important that I did not lean on my own strength.

Of course, I would never share this unless I have emerged out of the miry clay; it wasn’t wise to air my struggles to the world before the Lord had finished dealing with me. (I did reveal a glimpse of my emotions but only very briefly.) Once I had this issue resolved within me, I shared my journey with RY and asked him how he dealt with this through his years of ministry; I shared it with LK to be accountable to him; I shared it with HY because I am completely vulnerable with her. Yes, I did take a couple of weeks to recover but I was so glad to have trudged through it.

What can I say? God is faithful and sovereign. I believe He has intentionally held back the affirmation of men until I was secure in Him. A week after my lipoma operation, I received the REAL cushion from my champs. I remember telling RY how delighted I was to receive a gift from them and he smiled and rejoiced with me – I was already satisfied and if the gift had stopped there, I would have been a happy man. But my God is a God who dotes on me and goes the extra mile just to tell me that He loves me. I remember GM telling me that this was just “part one of the gifts – part two will blow your mind”. Of course that filled my heart with even more joy, but I didn’t need anything anymore because I already had God’s affirmation. I decided to be phlegmatic about this part two – if it comes, good, if it doesn’t, that’s all right.

Then it came today. And it blew my mind. So I shall let the pictures do the talking.

What can I say? I’m moved beyond words (and the 11 champs I had lunch with today saw my expression) – this incredibly-thick two-volume masterpiece was painstakingly assembled over the course of 10 weeks. The amount of work that has been put into this is immense – and I can only try to imagine its production process – conceptualising it, selecting pictures, printing photographs, pasting photographs systematically, comprehensively adding secular quotes, scriptures, their own reflections, my own quotable quotes which they remembered, cutting all these captions, meticulously sticking it into the album, decorating and designing it, investing money to make it happen…

WOW I REALLY DO NOT DESERVE THIS.

All I have done in the two months with them was just to do what God has always compelled me to do; what I’ve always enjoyed doing regardless of whether I was full-time, part-time or half-time; what Grace Assembly of God hired me to do; and what gave me the greatest satisfaction in life – believing in young people through my speech and actions. To an extent, I was really just doing my job.

AND THEN THEY GAVE ME THIS TRIBUTE.

I couldn’t help but to thank God for His unmerited favour in my life. I am stunned speechless. How can I not love them, love God, love my job and love other young people even more? I’ve said it many times and so I will say it again – there’s a reason why the REAL 2010 alumni will always remain in a special place in my heart. They reinforced it today. I can only look back and thank God for every minute spent with them.

I love you all. Thank you for blessing me. You have no idea how much this means to me. You gave me a reward the world could never give. I really love my job. Thank you, Lord, for placing me in such a privileged position. I love You so much.

off the record, for the record.

I’m genuinely stunned by the level of interest in my celebratory announcement – 335 hits! That’s madness, really. This is a record-breaking number of hits and it beat the previous record-breaking day by two-fold. Anyway, HY says it’s an anomaly and I concur. Nonetheless, thank you for sharing in our Dawson joy! God is good and I praise Him.

I had planned to write in advance and schedule posts during the course of the coming youth camp but since I enjoyed blogging by email via my mobile phone during Retreat, I shall attempt to retain this practice because I believe that God will continue to speak to me during Pierce, and I want to register it.

I shall leave you with a slideshow of a series of 30 encouragement cards which I have specially designed for Pierce; these will be the main vehicles of an improvised “Angel and Mortal” game that the campers will enjoy and learn from throughout the three days and nights. All pictures are original and were taken during my recent travels.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

A slight sidetrack here. I believe God has begun to develop a new gift in me – prophecy. I shall withhold details for now but I think it’s a landmark I’d want to journal down for it will demarcate a new journey in my spiritual development. I look forward to a breakthrough in my spiritual gifts. I desire to walk and live by the Spirit!

announcement! change of address in 2016!

I had intended to post a very (x 1 million) long entry, which I am currently still writing, but I can’t contain the joy anymore and I must declare it immediately. I promise though, that the elaborated entry will arrive in the coming days (if not, weeks). For now, HY and I are delighted to announce that we have, by the amazing grace of God, successfully selected a four-room flat in the coveted HDB Built-To-Order project called SkyVille @ Dawson, and we cannot wait to receive the flat in the coming years. I PROMISE – details to be released soon! But for now, here’s what our future home will look like!

The following pictures were all taken from here; this link is also the official website for this project. Our address in 2016: 87 Dawson Road #11-XX, Singapore 141087. (I ought to keep the unit number secret for security reasons…) Oh man, HY and I are super overwhelmed by God’s goodness! We have had one crazy journey with the Lord and we have so much, so much to thank God for! Thank you for all your prayers! HY and I are on our way to becoming property owners! Can’t wait! Can’t Wait!! CAN’T WAIT!!! (((:

youth camp update #3 – launch of camp tee!

I just got back from second last youth camp coordination meeting with the GII super Shepherds and boy I tell you, the countdown to 15 June is getting more and more exciting! PIERCE is going to be historic, without a shadow of a doubt. We’ll be doing many things for the first time and I shall keep all of that secret because I do not want to diminish your camp experience! The 11 of us simply cannot wait to execute all the programmes that we have painstakingly planned specially for you campers!

Tonight, together with ET, I’d also like to officially launch the youth camp t-shirt? Why with ET? Simple – this chilli-padi is the proud designer of the PIERCE logo, name tag and t-shirt and I’m super proud of her for accomplishing this task! Her (first published) work of art will now be proudly adorned by nearly a hundred people. Well done, ET! This is certainly a special achievement to rejoice over because this is the first ever R-AGE @ GII t-shirt of any kind! (On a personal note, I believe that ET will go on to become an excellent designer IF she puts in every effort into learning and mastering her craft!)

GOLD prints + blood RED tee = gorgeous.

We cannot wait to issue this memento to you – at the camp itself. Aren’t you glad you only paid $7 for this? For those who didn’t sign up for the camp – don’t worry; we will make it available to you immediately after the camp, on 19th June (Saturday), after R-AGE service. But there are only 20 extra pieces printed, so first come first served!

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, the countdown to PIERCE begins! Less than two weeks to go before we all go crazy at the best ever youth camp of R-AGE! Be excited!

anticipating the future with thanksgiving and hope.

Without a shadow of a doubt, it was a one of the most momentous nights for HY and I, and certainly the most significant landmark of our journey together yet. And because we try not to count chickens before they hatch, we won’t announce what we’re celebrating over until we actually secure it – this keeps us praying without complacency until 10 June. And as we began the night declaring, “Blessed be Your name, whether You give or You take”, we’ll continue to pray with hope, in the attitude of an open-palm surrender. Chat us up if you want to share our joy. And please, continue to keep us in prayer! After tonight, HY and I can only declare the goodness and faithfulness of God – this episode has certainly pushed our faith to another level. How can we keep from singing His praise and giving all the glory to Him? We experienced a miracle tonight for God answered our prayers beyond all our expectations. It went better than we had speculated, for sure!

But speaking of speculation… I shall divert your attention to something I found on a website, which would be really ridiculous if it actually happened to SMRT in the future.

when the best friend becomes the best man.

Please allow me to get all sentimental with LK as I await with bated breath the end of his bachelorhood. Although the picture below was taken at my fourth 21st birthday cum farewell party, it’s quite appropriately used now – only this time, I bid him farewell.

What more can I say about LK? He is a true friend who allows me to have total freedom to be myself; he’s someone whom I trust and love and have every confidence that the feeling is mutual. Being best friends for over a decade certainly reinforces the steel in our friendship. While I observe everyone’s “best friend” filtering in and out of their lives in the various stages of life, I thank God that I’m able to say that I have the same one.

I love you, bro, from the bottom of my heart. You better honour your word – we have to keep up with our monthly hangouts! Finally, heartiest and most heartfelt congratulations to you two and may you and JQ bring glory to God through your marriage!

i’m running for King Jesus. you?

The last and only time I ran a full marathon was way back in 2006, together with AT. I remember how we encouraged one another to keep the limbs moving, slapped Deep Heat on our legs, consumed those horribly-tasting power fluids, drowned ourselves with 100plus, grunted like a man at every restart and more memorably, how we told each other that we would start and end the marathon together. At the final kilometre, as we caught sight of the end point, we miraculously found strength from I-don’t-know-where and sprinted to the finish line. When we crossed it, our legs never felt that jelly before. It was a defining moment, for sure. Marathons are brotherhood-inducing activities.

Fast-foward four years, I signed myself up for the Standard Chartered Marathon that will take place on 5th Dec 2010. Registration opened today and I took advantage of the early bird price. (Thanks VY, for posting the link on Facebook – can’t wait to train together!) Yes, another gruelling 42.195km worth of sweat and pain. I look forward to the actual run as much as I look forward to the months of progressively intensive training; I remember how AT and I met at Bishan on a weekday at 7pm, ran to Sembawang and back and covered 27km, did our cool-down at 1130pm, looked at each other and wondered how we we were going to make it to work the next day. It was pure insanity, but it was good.

I was so proud of my achievement I kept my finisher’s medal and certificate, as well as my front and back runner’s tag. I also found a picture of myself online running the marathon!

I stayed over at AT’s place the night before and I remember designing the back tag. Adidas ran a campaign on your Reason for Running that year and I took a long time to ponder my message before I wrote that on my tag. Honestly, I didn’t know who or what else to run for except for the glory of God. If I was going to have six hours with thousands of other runners, then I might as well do something with it – so I told myself that I was going to run for Jesus, my King. This gesture to please God turned out to be an interesting experience for me. I had Christians of all ages and gender coming up to me to encourage and to affirm me. It was really quite an experience! I’d encourage everyone to consider taking part in a marathon at least once in their lives; I always tell myself it’d be a tale I’d be able to regale to my grandchildren.

It’s not about how well we start, or how well we run, but about us finishing it as well. Some people say life is short – but how short is it, really, if it’s all we have as mortal beings? Life on earth is actually pretty long – just about the longest duration of any event that we’ll ever experience! To me, life is a marathon – and I am determined to end it well to receive my medal, certificate, memory as well as a good pat on the back and a voice that will say, “Well done, thou good and faithful servant!” This year, as with every subsequent year from this point forth, I’m going to run for Jesus again. What about you?